September 10, 2010

Relationships - Your Work is Clear

In honor of Saturn in Libra, I will continue with my series on love and partnerships.

If you are looking for marriage or relationship advice at the moment, you are certainly not alone. The energies seem to be infused with relationship angst in one way or another at this time - and it's just getting started.

Break-ups, make-ups, perpetual singleness, stagnant marriages, boundary issues, frozen voices, silent deadlocks, differing views on commitment and love triangles - we are all feeling it.

Expect things to intensify and talks to deepen with the Venus Retrograde in Scorpio coming up soon. Ex's could reappear, karmic love stories come alive, differences of depth in intimacy become glaring or secrets emerge. It's all or nothing in relationships.

Meanwhile, here are some Saturn in Libra themes - do you fit into any of these?

One of you may want deeper commitment and the other might not. Maybe one person realizes that the relationship isn't right OR they are afraid to go deeper. Don't be afraid to be alone, if you've been together for years and one of you doesn't want to commit, with Saturn here, it's time to view things realistically, assess what you both fundamentally want and then stick by your principles.

If your lives are going in different directions and you want different things, the last resort is to go your separate ways. There is someone out there who wants what you want.

The Unspoken
Is there a gigantic pink elephant in the room? Unspoken truths that don't get discussed? One or both of you is in denial about something and it is eating away at you both.

Maybe this pink elephant is your partner's subconscious mind that they don't know what to do with. They have never learned what to do with it. All their unwanted feelings, which aren't 'nice' and they can't deal with, are stuffed down, hidden but you still have to deal with them. You have to feel for them. They don't go away, they aren't talked about, so they just float around the house like a ghost, like a third person waiting to be recognized and fed.

This energetic dance is like a slow death for those of you who crave deeper intimacy and can be worked through by honest discussion, preferably now before one of you snaps.

Relationships as a Mirror
Are you prepared to participate in the age old dance of seeing yourself through the eyes of another?

Relationships allow us to grow by understanding ourselves at a deeper level through mirroring the other. This can introduce real change and growth to your life. Others have the ability to transform you and vice versa.

When you start to do the real work, you will stop eternally dating the wrong people who don't nourish you. By experiencing yourself through another, you burn out a pattern of relating that you have inherited or created. One day you will say, 'No More, I won't accept your behaviour or mine any longer'.

If you stop doing something yourself which you don't like, you will stop receiving it from others. Whenever you want to make that decision is up to you. Sometimes you need a real nasty to come along to "pop your pimple" and excavate your hidden behaviour permanently or to show you quite explicitly how you are attracting that energy.

Can anyone relate to any of these situations?


  1. Oh, yeah. I'm starting my second Saturn return with Saturn now in Libra. I just had a 'natural parting of ways' with a partner, and -- although it feels right -- I still feel a little like I've been through a Hit and Run.

  2. That seems to be a perfect manifestation of Saturn in Libra for you Doug, especially with your natal Saturn in Libra too.

    I am sorry to hear of your parting, but I am sure with Saturn on your side it is for the best.


  3. Just want to say that I *really* get what you're going after on this blog. Don't stop!

  4. Hi Astro Harmonia, this one surely did hit the nail on the head. I'm currently going through my first Saturn return. Plus, it's been kind of quadruple whammy since I've got natal Sun, Jupiter, Pluto, and Saturn in Libra. One-on-one relationships but more importantly, it's been about recognizing the buried issues from childhood (my solar return has a stellium of planets in the 12th house, too, including Saturn + my sun). How am I faring through the two-year karmic debt collector? Well, I've lost my job, old friends, like really old friends since I've done some inner soul searching and figured it was really me that's been doing most of the job in all of my relationships (typical people pleasing Libra trait?). Anyway, there goes the Saturnine dry humor. I've been doing well through this difficult period in the sense that it's been so enlightening and life-changing. I had no idea I could be this strong and self-sufficient despite my need for having to build a wide circle of friends or whatever or maybe just in my imagination. So yeah, Saturn return - I've been reading a lot about them and thought this double karmic effect on me has been more of a stern, disciplinarian fatherly figure more and I totally cannot thank this transit enough for making me realize how much people-pleasing I've done in the past and always having to end up feeling like I was the only one in all of my relationships!

    Sorry about my long comment, but just to say too that your blog content about Saturn Return has been by far the most focussed and has nailed every point in the head. Thanks sooo much for your insights you have no idea how much this has helped me in some of my perspectives.


    1. Hi Kaloorwanda, thanks so much for your comment. I am partnering up with and have moved your comment over there. Let me know if its a problem!

      Check it out!