September 16, 2010

5 'Below the Surface' Reasons Why You Are Still Single

With Saturn in Libra, those relationships which are not serving both of you at the highest level will fall apart to leave space for something better structured and healthier to come in. Even if that means being by yourself for a while or for however long you need.

The keyword is balance. If you could not achieve this with your partner then you need time without anyone to get back your vital sense of homeostasis. Come back to yourself.

However, those of you who have been single for a long time might be feeling this more now that Saturn is in Libra. You might be analyzing yourself at a deeper level to understand why you cannot seem to find the perfect partner for you.

This of course needs to be looked at in a deeper way than the surface allows. Excuses like 'He chews with his mouth open' or 'There are just no available women in XYZ' just won't do.

5 'Below the Surface' Reasons Why You Are Still Single

1. You have an unconscious fear of commitment and intimacy, which manifests as no-one ever being good enough for you or never being able to find anyone suitable.

2. You don't know yourself well enough yet to know who would be a good match for you. Do you have illusions of grandeur or self-esteem issues? Maybe you're just choosing the wrong partners based on confusion in self. Or you just don't know yourself well enough yet to be able to 'come to the table' in a longterm relationship. You might need to go travelling in Tibet to find out what the shade of grass is. Wherever you go, there you are!

3. You believe in a fairytale relationship with no flaws. But these don't exist.

4. You haven't healed from dysfunctional patterns and habits picked up from your family, childhood environment or past partners and you project these stories onto your partner soon after you start seeing each other.

5. Your parent's suffocatingly bad relationship has given you an unconscious fear of being trapped in that particular relationship hell.

You can overcome all of these! With just a sprinkling of self-honesty in how you relate to others and a willingness to start anew. And Saturn in Libra is the perfect time to do it.

Anyone going through this process of self-discovery?


  1. I am right in the thick of it! I'll be 30 on Dec 27.

  2. yes. this is so tough for me. i was single for a while then i jumped into something that fell apart because i really need to be by myself until i get it together.